To Believe?

We all have dreams that fairy tales can come true if you just believe. Believe in what? People tell me all the time… “Av, put yourself out there. The reason why you are single is because you don’t make an effort to find anyone.” I want to ask Why? Why should I put myself out there? To be rejected? I spent the first 23 years of my life putting myself out there. Yes, I had more confidence then…I was cute then and had a lot going for me. Now, well I guess the confidence has gone and I wouldn’t dare take a chance on telling a guy I was interested. And why should I? I’m looking for someone that frankly has the balls to tell me that he’s interested in me. Am I just around too many shy guys or is the message out there that “he’s just not that into you.” Well whatever it is…I’m sick of looking…I’m sick of hoping…and I’m sick of believing that there is one person for everyone. Should I become comfortable with fact that I’ll be alone forever?

Well the truth is I don’t want to be alone. I want to believe in fairy tales. I want to believe that there is a perfect man for this imperfect woman. Why not? If we don’t have hope, what’s the whole point of life? We need hope to move us forward…we need faith to help us get through the tough times. We need to believe that if you do wish upon a star, all your dreams can come true…even if your dream is to find the perfect man.

Notes from the author: As I’m on a two year adventure in the UK, I would like to share my thoughts, experiences, and my reflections of my life in this ongoing column that I would like to call the “The Wandering I.” Please come back and read my stories about relationships, culture, and self discovery.